How Am I Supposed to Help Others Live Better Lives When I Can’t Even Live Well Myself?

Question by Sahar: How am I supposed to help others live better lives when I can’t even live well myself?
I’ve been spiraling. It’s like my brain’s gone haywire and literally every bad thing I’ve done, every humiliating memory, every step in the wrong direction I’ve taken is coming back to haunt me. It’s making me go crazy. I keep having these dreams, nightmares I should say, about the unspeakable. I’m a part of group at school which is supposed to help other students cope with traumatic events and drug abuse by peer counseling and offering help for those kids who need it. I find it funny how I’m one of the few picked to help others when I can’t even help myself. I’ve been having thoughts of suicide, but I’m too afraid to tell anyone because of fear of I don’t know what. It’s just getting all bad. It’s not just one event causing these thoughts, it’s multiple situations. Situations I don’t have answers to, situations I don’t want to have answers to. My whole life seems worthless. Almost as if every breath I take is just a waste of this good Earth’s oxygen. I want to stop thinking forever.

Best answer:

Answer by Vortex
Sometimes to help others you have to have experienced the same bad things. You seem well equipped to give advice on everything bad. Why don’t you write me and reveal some of the worst thing in your past. I may not be able to help you but I would enjoy hearing about it. Good Luck!

Answer by Happy Hippie
You’ve been chosen for a reason. In fact everybody can help others -yes, even people who can’t live well. Most people can’t live well, yet they help others and it’s the act of helping others that helps them. It’s all a circle of mutual help and caring, that makes Humanity grow. We can’t wait until our lives are perfect to help others, because that moment may never come, and in the meantime those other people could be feeling much better just because you’re there. And in turn, by being such an important part in their lives, you’re going to experience a lot of happiness too (however dark your life is). That’s how bad memories are healed -or at least it helps a lot-, that’s how we make this world a better place.

Those people you’re helping, don’t really need you to give them answers. They need you to give them your support. Someone who believes in them. That alone is enough. If you have answers, then give them answers. But if you don’t, your support and you being there will be more than enough to change their lives. Your life is NOT worthless, and you’ve just been given the chance to realise how meaningful it is -by helping those kids. Give it a try!

And if you’re feeling suicidal, by all means, seek help yourself! It’s nothing to be ashamed or afraid of; we’re all here to help each other. Find a good therapist who cares (some don’t care but others do, and you’ll find those). You help those kids, and others help you. That’s why we are all ONE, and if one is missing it wouldn’t be the same 😉 Your presence is important in this world. I could offer my listening too if you want to write: [email protected]

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